Okay so this week Matt continues to be difficult. Matt had a freakout on Sunday, for reasons unbeknownst to either of us. In a desperate attempt to keep him from hurting himself, I called his mom and put her on speaker phone so she could talk him down.
Well, it worked. But, while on speaker phone, his mother did something I didn't expect.
As you may know, Matt and I have been fighting repeatedly because he wants a key to my place to get in when he gets off work. I have refused to give him a key, because he abused that privelege TWICE. In March, he had girls in my apartment, while I was at work, without my permission or knowledge. I found out from someone else. He apologized, and I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. I gave him his key back.
In May, he had a girl in my apartment, while I was at work, without my consent or knowledge. I found out from someone else. Only this time, he admitted that he MADE OUT WITH HER. IN MY APARTMENT.
I've been letting him stay with me while we try to figure out how to relate to each other, since I'm 3 months pregnant. He has been upset that I won't give him a key, because according to him, it's been almost 2 months, and he did apologize after all, and he's tired of wandering around all night while I'm at work. Nevermind that there are all night coffee shops at his disposal in the city. There are places he could go.
Now, cut back to Sunday. We are in my kitchen, with his mom on speaker phone. He's been cutting himself and she has convinced him to give me the razor and agree to go see a doctor this weekend. And then I hear this:
"I understand how hard it must be not to have anywhere to go after work. I just can't imagine having to deal with that. I don't think it's right, and I don't think it's fair...but I'm not going to get in the middle of it. If you can't handle that though, just know that you can come home."
WHAT???!!! First of all, saying that on speaker phone while I'm in the room - thanks for the guilt trip. You're right. It's my fault your son cuts himself. It can't have anything to do with him being unable to deal with the consequences of his actions.
Second - there are a lot of things that are unfair about this situation. Now, I'm not a doctor, maybe I'M the one who is disturbed here. But I don't think that precious widdle Maffew having his key priveleges revoked after HE FUCKED ME OVER TWICE is the least bit unfair. Considering that I'm still letting him stay with me, I let him keep the phone line in my name, I've been feeding him, driving him around, taking him to Canton to visit his mother and his daughter, ordering his daughter's birth certificate for him, etc. etc. I think I have been MORE than fair.
Third - If you're not going to get in the middle of something, don't express your god damn opinion on speaker phone with both people in the room!!! That's called jumping into the middle with both feet.
I can't even describe how furious, disgusted, and hurt I am over that comment. I understand a woman protecting her son. But that comment made me feel that she has no respect for me at all. I seriously doubt that would be her opinion if the cheater in question was anyone but her son.
When it comes to things that don't pertain to me and are absolutely none of my business, I have an opinion too. But since this is a public forum, I'll keep it to myself.
I promised last time that I wouldn't bitch but I didn't expect to be passive aggressively barbed by his mother.
Oh yeah - this week I'm 12 weeks. Woo hoo.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
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I really want to say a lot of things right now. I'm furious for you. But in keeping with the theme of keeping one's opinions to yourself, I'm not going to say any more. Aaargh.
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